MJ Crossing 40

I figured I’d better get my “40″ post in before Shawn’s birthday rolls around next month.  As it turns out, 40 was a moment of pretty big changes for me.  Let’s see…

• I quit my job.  Of course I work as a freelancer so this is sort of different, but I did have to break a contract.  It’s turned out to be a great move though.  Don’t regret it a bit.  Though I am starting to miss earning money…
• Maiken and I came a hair’s breadth from making a really major change, which was moving to Oregon.  We had even located a family who wanted to rent our Pasadena house for a year.  The family backed out when they discovered how bad Pasadena’s schools are (made me want to give Howard Jarvis a swift kick to the nuts, even though he’s dead), and Maiken kinda changed her mind too.  So we’re still in Pasadena.
• I took on some pro bono work.  Now I get why people do this.  Expectations are really low, and people are grateful for whatever they get.  Both happen to be in the education area – I’m helping a group of geophysics students at USC design three different “serious games,” and in a couple weeks I’ll be sitting down and intensely planning a games education curriculum with Lane Community College up in Oregon.  
• I fell down the stairs.  There were actually a lot of mitigating circumstances, such as:
  • it was dark
  • it was the spiral stairs
  • I had objects in both hands
  • I was wearing nylon socks

but the fact remains, to celebrate my 40th birthday, I fell down the stairs.  Nothing quite like Matt’s story, but nonetheless apt.  And as a friend said “well, at least you didn’t break your hip.” 

A few weeks past 40, and things are kind of settling down.  I have several new jobs, Lily has just been admitted at long last to a private school that we really like (and which was her first choice), and after deciding not to move to Oregon, we’ve managed to rent out the house up there basically solid for the entire summer, which helps to fill the income gap.   

Insofar as 40 has made me reflective, I think I’ve actually had a hell of a great 40 years.  Very few regrets.  Without doubt, the best decision I made during that period was the decision to go to Oxy.  As Ron can attest, it was a step well outside my comfort zone in 1985, but established a precedent which has served me very well in life.  And also introduced me to some remarkable people that I’m always pleased to call my friends. 

Probably the consideration of moving back to my home town had more influence on making me reflective than the 40 milestone… and it brought me back to a poem that I read, probably in high school, that I’ll leave you with:  

ITHAKA
by Constantine Cavafy (1863-1933) 

As you set out for Ithaka
hope your road is a long one,
full of adventure, full of discovery.
Laistrygonians, Cyclops,
angry Poseidon-
don’t be afraid of them:
you’ll never find things like that on your way
as long as you keep your thoughts raised high,
as long as a rare excitement
stirs your spirit and your body.
Laistrygonians, Cyclops,
wild Poseidon-you won’t encounter them
unless you bring them along inside your soul,
unless your soul sets them up in front of you. 

Hope your road is a long one.
May there be many summer mornings when, 
with what pleasure, what joy, 
you enter harbors you’re seeing for the first time; 
may you stop at Phoenician trading stations 
to buy fine things, 
mother of pearl and coral, amber and ebony,
sensual perfume of every kind- 
as many sensual perfumes as you can; 
and may you visit many Egyptian cities 
to learn and go on learning from their scholars. 

Keep Ithaka always in your mind. 
Arriving there is what you’re destined for. 
But don’t hurry the journey at all. 
Better if it lasts for years, 
so you’re old by the time you reach the island,
wealthy with all you’ve gained on the way, 
not expecting Ithaka to make you rich. 
Ithaka gave you the marvelous journey. 
Without her you wouldn’t have set out. 
She has nothing left to give you now.

And if you find her poor, Ithaka won’t have fooled you.
Wise as you will have become, so full of experience,
you’ll have understood by then what these Ithakas mean.